Tuesday, September 11, 2018

Commentary: Battlefield "V agina" - Ruining Fun With Politics

By Aaron Clarey

The short version is this:

Electronic Arts releases the trailer for "Battlefield V" a sequel to a long-running series of war FPS games.

The trailer gets horrific reviews because of the blatant politics where there is a handicapped woman on the cover of the game, who also happens to be the hero of the game.  Never mind women were scarcely present on the battlefields of WWII, never mind it alienated your customer base, Battlefield "V agina" will be shoved down your throats.

Electronic Arts doubles down saying that "women heroes are here to stay"because they think lying about history and virtue signaling will get more female players and boost sales.  Alan Kertz, a lead designer (I believe) of the game, triples down saying that his daughter's desire to play a WWII female soldier is more important than...well... anything else...including the $100 million MINIMUM it took to develop it and another $100 million I estimate to market it.

And if you were still hoping that you would not be lectured by gender politics in one of the few havens of fun left in your life, EA QUADRUPLES down with one of their executives, Patrick Soderlund, who said "Accept it or Dont buy the game."  Since then Mr. Soderlund has left EA.

Naturally when you ignore the demands of your customers and put politics ahead of profits, it tends to take a toll on your sales and your stock price.

But do not fear my fine fellow EA shareholder.  EA's corporate executives and managerial staff will never give up their precious politics and no amount of your profit can convince them otherwise.  This is the new marketing strategy.  This is the new point and purpose of going into business.  This is the new paradigm.  Politics must come before profits.

However, let the Ole Captain provide you a little bit of free consulting which he normally doesn't do.

I don't know if the people at Dice (EA's subsidiary in charge of Battlefield V agina) are too busy avoiding no go zones in Sweden (they're Swedish) as they bend over bow down to the altar of diversity, but perhaps they missed a couple other attempts at forcing politics in with people's fun.

Feminist Ghostbusters was (in case you didn't know Kertz) a flop.

Solo, which was actually a good movie, also flopped in part because of flooding the market with Star Wars movies, but also in part because of identity politics.

And if movies are too far removed, perhaps people remember Mass Effect Andromeda where the characters were made purposely ugly to appease an SJW minority.  I remember when it was launched and it was a debacle, but the interwebz has kept ultimate sales obscure, which leads me to believe final sales were a disappointment.

I could go on, but my point ironically is not political.  It's logical.  It's simple. It's ethical.  It's even childish.


When I was a kid I remember getting gifts on Christmas that were about Christ and Christianity.  They sucked because religion (which is not fun) was forced into, and thus ruined, my fun.

The past two years football fans, who bust their asses off during the week, and just want to sit down and enjoy a good football game on Sunday, have to have Colin Kapernic's dick shoved down their throats while he and his dipshit brigade of ungrateful millionaires claim they're oppressed and take a knee during the national anthem.  This forces politics in people's much-coveted fun, and the NFL has paid a dear price.

And if these examples don't paint a clear enough picture for you, perhaps imagining pouring yourself one of your favorite finest scotches after a long hard week...no...YEAR of working on some major project.  And right before I serve it to you I drop a big old turd into it and make you smell it. 

Now I know you Swedish developers at Dice and you corporate executives in EA have been completely indoctrinated in school and college to think everything in your life has to have a political element to it.  I know every corporation in the western world simply can't make a good product at a good price, they have to virtue-signal to the rest of the world just how leftist-socialist-green-utopia-diversity-vagina-for-the-poor-transgendered-unicorn you all are. And I know, quite literally, your entire lives have been in an echo-chamber that you forgot what it's like to be a child and just want to have fun, BUT....

the rest of us in the real world haven't.

And we don't like politics forced into our fun.

The real issue is whether you guys are going to be employees for a corporation, of which you are going to work hard to put forth a product people want, making us happy, making your employer money, and making yourselves a successful career?


Are you going to become ideologues or SJW's, forcing your politics into everybody's fun?  And if you choose the later then realize that not only are you tyrants, but you're also dicks because there's no more of a dick move than ruining other people's fun.

Again, just my free advice, but I'd kindly suggest you take your turds out of my drinks.

Editor's note: This article was originally published at Captain Capitalism and has been rerun with permission.

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